027: Making me a priority – Sarah Batsanis

the-fearless-females-podcast-sarah-batsanis

In this episode:

In this episode of The Fearless Females Podcast your host Tegan Mathews interviews Sarah Batsanis who shares:

  • How she was afraid to put her wants and needs first
  • How she allowed herself to become disempowered
  • The workshop that began her journey to turning her life around
  • Learning to please herself without the guilt
  • Knowing the difference between fear and intuition

Tegan's Take Aways:

  1. We are all chasing that feeling of love and connection but if you aren’t connected and loving to yourself, how can you expect anyone else to.
  2. If you have bad dialogue going on in your mind every day then you aren’t going to hear or accept anyone’s praise or compliments
  3. What you put out, you get back so you had better be sure to put out good stuff
  4. Everything works out when you just let it go.
  5. Don’t be serious all of the time, be responsible but also allow yourself to have fun regularly.

About Sarah Batsanis

Sarah Batsanis is Australia’s leading Stress Specialist, Relationship Mentor, Love & Confidence Coach and Speaker, who is passionate about creating lasting positive change in people. Married together with her husband for almost 20 years, she has been working on relationships and giving people the life empowering skills to help change how they feel fast, & live and express their highest truth, to find love, connection, and understanding within themselves, as well as gain clarity, and peace of mind when it comes to the opposite sex.

Some of Sarah’s main areas of focus are helping people overcome Relationship breakdowns, to find love, fix their relationship, gain confidence and stop stress primarily using Faster EFT, a cutting edge system that works to address unwanted emotions and physical pain within the mind and body.

Contact Sarah Batsanis

A Gift for Listeners From Sarah Batsanis

You have the choice of two gifts from Sarah. The first is a 30 minute clarity session via phone or skype where we look at where you are, where you want to be and what’s holding you back.

The second option is a love assessment where we dive deep into what’s holding you back from finding true love. Where are you sabotaging your opportunity to be loved.

By entering your name & email address we agree we won't share your details with anyone! You may receive the occasional emails from Sarah Batsanis and Faster EFT. You can unsubscribe at any time.

Show Notes: Episode 027: Making me a priority – Sarah Batsanis

Sarah Batsanis’ Fearless Story

It all started for me when my children were quite young, 4 & 6 approximately and I knew I wanted to start working for myself and get some study behind me but I didn’t know how or where to start.

To cut a long story short, I had been invited to a weekend hypnotherapy workshop and by the end of the workshop I had really grasped how the mind works and I really wanted to pursue that.

At the end of the weekend we got offered the opportunity to go to the Gold Coast and continuing the education and I just didn’t think I could do it because it meant I had to leave my kids with my husband for a week and I had never done that before so I just didn’t think I could do it but I really wanted to.

The course was going to be $3000 and I was just so afraid of what my husband would think of me spending that amount of money, what the in-laws would think of me leaving the children. So I was focused on what everyone else would think.

So I weighed it all up and to me, this was a once in a lifetime opportunity. To me this was going to get my career started and it was a vital part of my self-development. So I gave him my credit card and signed up and then walked outside thinking, “What have I done, how am I going to tell my husband and what will my kids think of me leaving them for a week?”

That was the beginning of me stepping up. It was the difference between my own fears and empowerment. This was the first thing I had done for me since having my children. It was something for me.

How I told my husband – with a lot of fear and a lot of trying to work out how I would say it and in the end I just said it was something I needed to do for myself and if I wanted to follow the path of being my own boss while the kids are at school then this is an opportunity for me.

It was at that point though, I was pretty much committed even if he had said no because I had put that money down and to this day I am pretty sure I would have just said that I have to go and I have to follow it because it was just such a strong thing that I knew I needed to do and would give me the opportunities I wanted.

It’s still a bit of a blur and I know I got tongue tied which is what happens when fear is in control and that was the sort of person I was around my husband then. I was very dis-empowered and he was 8 years older than me and so I had him up on a pedestal. I had the belief that he was a lot smarter than I was

How did you decide it was worth it?

I think it was just a knowing for me. I always wanted to help people. I grew up with a sister that was diagnosed as manic depressant and with schizophrenia so sharing a room with her I always knew I wanted to help her and to help other people.

So having a week where I knew I was going to learn a lot about myself and about other people and getting the tools to enable me to help them overcome their fears and challenges. I just knew it was going to be the start of something great and that’s exactly what it was.

When you believe in something enough and have that ‘gut feeling’ it’s amazing what you can do to make something happen. That’s so true and I have been working with that ever since. When you have fear you tend to over ride that gut feeling but now I have the time to slow down and really tune into that intuition.

Back then it was the fear of what other people would think but now it's remembering to come back to my own self and that its ok to follow my own gut feeling and my own path no matter how much other people might not like it, this is my own truth.

It was about following that truth and not denying it anymore because I had suppressed it for so long because I was so dis-empowered. I had him up on a pedestal and I had moulded myself to what I thought he wanted me to be in return for getting more love and affection. So I wasn’t really coming from that true place.

So often we get caught up in the ego heart that is led by fear and thinking that we should be doing something or we need to or we have to. These are all ego based and head stuff rather than from the heart. It’s about knowing how to use that intuition and gut feeling even when we do have fear.

So many clients I work with are held back by so many things and often they are fear. Everything we want is on the other side of fear. Not only do we have to face the fear but we have to accept the fear, we have to let go of the fear. There are so many different aspects and if we could just get over that fear we will see the rainbow because it is there, we just need to get over it first to get to what’s on the other side.

That’s often difficult to do when you are a mother, wife, daughter, friend. You have all of these other roles and responsibilities that often we forget about ourselves and to ask what we want. So well done on making that decision which would have been hard to do as a mother.

What happened after you decided to take that action?

This was really the turning point for me. After I studied the hypnotherapy I then did some NLP (neuro linguistic programming), some life coaching and numerous other things after that. Then I came across the Faster EFT technique which is the faster version of the Emotional Freedom Technique in 2010.

Once I did that and went and did a seminar on it, that’s when a whole other turning point happened in my life. I had treatment for my own issues where I had back and stomach pain, relationship issues and stress problems etc and I was completely blown away.

I had been stressed in a stressful working environment for six years and I also had relationship issues as there was a lot of resentment towards my husband that had built up over the years until I eventually lost my gallbladder. When you think about your gallbladder it’s really your centre of power, your gall.

I was disempowered. I was powerless because I was allowing my husband to control me. I only had myself to blame but there was a build up of stress and resentment from not being able to do what I really wanted to do. This is what Louise Hay talks about how we physicalize what we are going through emotionally within our bodies.

How did you turn all of that around?

I started doing Faster EFT sessions and started to get my life back on track. I left the stressful job and stopped feeling like a victim in my relationship. I felt like there were a lot of things I wasn’t getting in my relationship. For many years I used to walk around with the belief that I just wasn’t getting the love and affection.

Of course, everything is language and energy so I was putting that belief out into the world and consequently, that’s what I was getting back – not enough love and affection. Through Faster EFT and learning how to love me and put myself as a priority, together with building up my own self-esteem and my own empowerment through the tapping and through healing, enabled me to get to the point of turning my relationship around.

We have been together for almost twenty years and not only have I been able to turn that relationship around but also the relationship with myself which is now so much more kinder, nicer, loving and supportive. And how I treat myself is how I am going to treat you and others so being the best version of me enabled me to come from a place of compassion for others. Instead of feeling unloved and lonely. I began to please myself without the guilt.

My husband had been so used to seeing me be the pleaser and then one day he said to me, “You’ve changed, you’re like Sarah with attitude now” and I explained to him that it wasn’t that I had attitude, it was that I had found myself and I know who I am and I’m not going to be tolerating the things I used to put up with.

Some people might judge but this is what we are all looking for as far as I’m concerned. We want to feel good about ourselves. We are all chasing a feeling and that feeling is love. And combine connection with that too because if you aren’t loving and connecting with yourself, how can you expect anyone else to.

People might say nice things about you but if you aren’t being kind to yourself and if you have bad dialogue going on in your mind every day then you aren’t going to hear or accept their compliments. You aren’t going to be able to receive that compliment because of how you feel about yourself. We really need to learn how to have a great relationship with ourselves first and learn how to love and connect with us first before anything else.

What are you passionate about today?

Where I’m at now is I am at a playful stage, a self-expression stage. I made a pact with myself last year to find ways for me to express myself. I’m happy with my life, work is good, I get to help people every day and I wanted to find ways I could express the embodiment of who I am outwardly.

Since putting that out to the universe I have had invitations to people's bands and to freedom dancing and all sorts of fun things. Different ways to feel and for self-expression and to just allow me to be me, that free spirit who has fun.

Recently I met a gentleman who is a psychic and a medium and I spoke to him recently. I run an empowering women's group and have done for five years and I’ve been looking for a man to facilitate a mans empowering group. He put his hand up straight away and said, “I’m in”.

We then had a conversation about how we all want to have self-expression and we all want to have fun. We’ve all forgotten how to have fun. I left home at fifteen and I was working two jobs and life was serious. There wasn’t a lot of time to have fun.

So, John and I have come together to help people to explore that and to connect people together with love and connection and bringing back that fun and that play and allowing people to be themselves to connect with one another and just enjoy life and not be so serious. To let go of the fears for a while.

I came up with a saying yesterday which was, “Let go of the fear and let the fun appear” and that’s basically where I’m at right now. A lot of people don’t know what they like, they certainly know what they don’t like and that’s where it stops. But if they are just willing to open that up.

I came across a list the other day of great hobbies. They are catagorised and it’s now something I use with my clients now. If something resinates with them as they go down the list then I recommend they get out of their comfort zone and give it a go. That’s the only way you are going to know if you like it or not.

Say yes to experiencing life and see what opportunities come up for you. Don’t wait until you are in the mood to go and do that fun thing, do the fun thing and that will put you in the right mood.

What is something in your future plan that scares you?

Often when people have future plans that’s where fear can set in. I guess I try to take each day as it comes. I’m a little different in that way because I like to live in the now because I believe that’s all we have. So if there is fear in that day then I will use my own technique - the Faster EFT and I will tap on that.

I really try and live for the now because too often you hear of people who wait until they are retired and they have all of these great plans but the truth is that you don’t know what’s going to happen tomorrow. Lets be real, I’m quite a realist, you can have these grand plans but if you aren’t here tomorrow to enjoy them then that’s time wasted.

I live each day as much as I can and try to incorporate that fun, play aspect as much as I can.

Five Fast Fun Fearless Facts about Sarah Batsanis

  1. Who inspires you? The creator of Faster EFT and my mentor for the past six years, Robert Smith inspires me with his wisdom. Also Bruce Lipton who is a cellular biologist and is bringing out epigenetics and how we can change our dna by what we think.
  2. Favourite thing to do each day? Besides tapping and maybe dancing and tapping at the same time, I love people and I love coffee so anywhere I can have a coffee and some good conversation, I’m there!
  3. What's something that still scares you? I’ll have to get back to you on that one. Nothing really comes to mind. I’m sure there are things as we are all human right? But that just doesn’t enter my realm any more.
  4. Favourite technique or app or book? Technique = tapping (Faster EFT) Book = The Secret Language of Your Body by Inna Segal and Louise Hay’s You Can Heal Your Life – which give heaps of different elements of the emotional components of physical pain.
  5. If you could wave a magic wand and fix one thing in the world right now, what would it be and why? I think if I could wave a magic wand and have everyone in the world know that they are loved, that would be great. And to know how to do amazing relationships and how to make them work, that would be good too. Knowing how to keep that aliveness and bringing more people together, that would be my thing, to ultimately share that love and be loved.

 

Final Question for Sarah Batsanis

If you could turn back time what's the one piece of advice you wish you could give your fourteen-year-old self?

Don’t worry about what other people think. Be yourself and express yourself without that fear and worry of others. And to just have fun! Relax and don’t be so stressed and caught up. Everything works out when you just let it go.

Where can people reach out to you? 

www.fastereft.com.au

A Gift for Listeners From Sarah Batsanis

You have the choice of two gifts from Sarah. The first is a 30 minute clarity session via phone or skype where we look at where you are, where you want to be and what’s holding you back.

The second option is a love assessment where we dive deep into what’s holding you back from finding true love. Where are you sabotaging your opportunity to be loved.

By entering your name & email address we agree we won't share your details with anyone! You may receive the occasional emails from Sarah Batsanis and Faster EFT. You can unsubscribe at any time.

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